this bridezilla post may or may not be explicit.

Everyone knows, Taylor finally got the balls to propose. And we are happy and excited and in love. And I am going to write a post about the engagement story so that I can refer people to it when they ask. But later.

Planning a wedding has made me feel like a total bridezilla. But not like you'd THINK I'd be a bridezilla.

I am getting really p.o.'d about traditional, typical, BORING weddings. It's a really stupid thing to get mad about.

I think my initial anger came when I changed my facebook status to engaged (because it ain't legitimate unless it's on facebook) and instantly the little ads on the side bar popped up and were screaming at me about wedding dresses and photographers and caterers and cakes and frilly things telling me to fall right into the standard wedding mold.

The thing is that you're supposed to have a HUGE fkn diamond. and it's supposed to be white gold, because yellow gold is out. You're supposed to make your bridesmaids spend hundreds of dollars on dresses they'll never wear again, and then also do your bidding, and in return, you give them a 3 dollar gift. You're supposed to send out save the dates, then send announcements, then send invitations. You're supposed to spend a lot of money on flowers. You're supposed to have roses. You're supposed to make the groom wear a tux. You're supposed take your engagements by train tracks and wrap your arm around your fiancée proudly displaying your ring like it's a natural way for you to pose. You're supposed to have a big WHITE 3000 dollar designer wedding dress. You're supposed to coordinate your colors with the season you're getting married in. You're supposed to do everything according to a tradition that you have no idea who in hell started. You're supposed to serve everyone dinner and make them listen to boring music and sit around while you feed each other cake and stand around and smile like fkn idiots while really all you wanna do is rip each others clothes off and do it right there on the gift table, and they wanna go home and watch re runs of The Office. You're supposed to forget that you are getting married because you're in love and realize that a wedding is about show and nothing else and it's officially your number one priority. Essentially and frankly you're supposed to spend that ca-ca-cash, conform, and act like a bitch.

BUT LET THE RECORD SHOW, I am not going to do everything how I'm supposed to. And I hate openly saying that I am doing the opposite of the masses. But no matter how stressed I get, I will NOT forget that I am doing this whole wedding so that I can marry my best friend, get gifts, and celebrate with all of the people that I love. My wedding is not gonna be a show, it's gonna be a color coordinated hardcore party. And I don't really care what anyone thinks of it.

And just as a side note, I am not ashamed to admit that I spent 35 bucks on my wedding dress. and 15 bucks a piece on my Bridesmaid dresses. SUCKA WHAAAAT?