promulgation.

Just so everyone is clear on this,
"Your Mom" jokes were cool like ...6 years ago.

Not anymore.
So give it up.

Sure, I posed. I needed the money.

This is simply a compilation of thoughts, since I don't feel I take advantage of the privilege of having a blog nearly enough. Some of them might not make sense, and may offend you, but consider yourself warned.

• A word of advice to women out there. It is NOT acceptable for a boy to make you cry. Yeah maybe you overexaggerate the situation cause you were blessed with unreasonable amounts of estrogen. But if he says something hurtful to you or about you, dump his A. Seriously. You'll find better.

• The ball to penis ratio was unreasonable.

• Weird people are bothersome. Not like the kind of weird people who are cool and intriguing but the people who think that being poor means you can only afford to wear clothes that are EXTREMELY out of date. I'm pretty poor myself, but it's called a clearance rack. Look into it. Pre-teens are especially weird, sometimes I stare at them and think of my greasy haired braces days and feel SO sorry for them that it's almost painful to look. But once I get over my pity for them, I go back to wanting to throw something blunt at their head. Just because you have hair growing in weird places doesn't mean you have to take it out on everyone else, freaks.

• I love beards. I really do, I'm toying with the idea of making it a prerequisite for my EC. Must grow a full sexy beard. Speaking of beards, today is my first Sunday of redemption, I must prove to hot beardie that I am not an idiot. Wish me luck, cause I'm nervous.

• I am less than 4 months away from getting a well deserved roundhouse kick to the face., or a hug, a hug will do. I'm so excited for Timothy to come home. I could scream! Eeek.

• Being happy is a really strange feeling when you went through months of being conditionally happy. But it's totally a good feeling. It makes everything seem a little bit more funny too. Even the stuff that should normally be depressing, like these days if fall down my stairs and my blood starts to pool on the kitchen tile, i might have a really good laugh about it. Instead of being concerned that I have a huge head wound that should definitely get looked at.

• Shoot, I just realized that the above scenario really could happen. I should be more cautious.

• She's dancin with the cream... I love that there's so many different forms of crazy. There's crazy people that kill people, and then there's crazy people that do this - dance on Melrose with Josh Kalis' DC shoes on

• I love you Max Bemis.

• If you got tattoos above your vagina, you're a dirty girl.

Wangs and Dongs.

Dear Male Gender (discluding my father),

I hate you today, possibly for the remainder of the week too.

Love Always,
Kynslie.

It's me, Margaret.

At age 12, I recieved a "gift" from mother nature.

Mother nature, I should punch you in ribs for that. You totally deserve it.

(This gift is the reason I don't feel guilty littering from time to time. )

The thing about this gift is that there's lots to it. Lots of unpleasant things. It's not, bam I bleed for 5-7 days, and then it's over. Bloody brings his uninvited friends, Crampy, Bloaty, Moody, HeadAchey, and if we're lucky, Fatiguey.

And here we sit, as women who are forced into a menstrual cycle without permission. And if we even say, "I am on my period." Men have the audacity to tell us, "TOO MUCH INFORMATION!! Stop talking about it!!" as if we OWE it to them to keep our mouths shut about it, or it's painful for them to HEAR about it. Well my male friends. you GET to hear about it; I bleed out of my blessed crotch for FIVE to SEVEN days. I have the option to either A) Shove a cotton torpedo up there to prevent a mess or B) Tape a small mattress-like apparatus to the lining of my underwear, much like a diaper. or C) Worst case scenario, if the bleeding is really extreme, an actual diaper. As I listed before there are many other symptoms that come along with this unsought infirmity.

But, it doesn't end there. The reason that we have this cycle is so that we are able to reproduce. And word on the street is that child bearing and child birth, is even more FUN and EXCITING! So I've got that to look forward to.. And this is to be continued when I get to that chapter in life.
Period.